I noticed that when I invest any type of feelings in someone that I usually care for them more than they may for me. Now this may be due to dealing with people who aren’t good for me but I think it’s something else. I’ve never experienced the “joys” and feelings of being in love and I think my mind and heart subconsciously yearns for that. I think this is why I care so much for my friends and the family I actually deal with. I believe that I form deep connections as a result of the emotional part of myself never being fulfilled.
Because of this I try to limit myself from liking people. I deny crushes sometimes because I assume it won’t work in my favor. I can avoid possible disappointment by never allowing it to be a possibility. Is thisa good way to live? We all know that’s a no and I swear I’m trying to get better. But until then I need to learn to scale back how much I care for people, be it platonic or emotionally because until my heart gets what it yearns for it will keep causing me to care too deeply for those who do not feel the same.
